Senseless

There are really truly no words to describe the tragedy that took place this morning in Connecticut. My heart, like so many other peoples, was ripped apart. I can't begin to think about what it would be like to face that as a parent. So much that I have read and watched online today has brought tears to my eyes. Even the President was deeply affected by this. Regardless of your political affiliation, I think his statements made as a parent were right on the money.

I was saddened and angered to see so much of an instant crush on FB regarding gun control. There are certainly many sides to that whole entire argument, and much to support both sides factually. But today is not the time for that. Today is a time to grieve. Today is a time to pray, and look for ways to support this community.

One of my best friends up in Canada made a very timely statement on FB. To paraphrase, he said that as sad as the shooting was, there was little or no coverage in the media about the 100s of people, many children included, who died this week in Syria. Or of the knife attack in China. His point was one of heart, and focus, and it made me really think about God's heart in this.

As much as I can't imagine what the parents of these beautiful kids are going through right now, unopened Christmas gifts, no more "guess what I made at school today!" no more laughter, no more.....no more, I can't imagine God's heart and how much it breaks on such a constant basis for us all. He is so saddened by loss, by these senseless deaths, He is saddened by the struggle of the young man who apparently had some mental stability issues. He is also saddened by the choices we make in our daily lives that separate us from Him. As a parent, I can't begin to imagine the courage and fortitude it would take to forgive a person for hurting or even killing one of my children. My rage, my anger, my blind fury would be overwhelming for me. Yet that is what God asks us to do, because He did it for us through Christ. He asks us to forgive this incredible and debilitating trespass, as He forgives us our trespasses. Can I? Not yet. I don't think so. I want to, in principle, but I can't. Not without God's help. I think He's patient enough with us to walk us through that process in His own way.

I have had cause to practice a much smaller form of forgiveness as I have walked through the extremely painful breakdown of relationship with the Impact World Tour leadership that happened several years ago. It was a painful betrayal, and it cost us very dearly. But God has met me in my hurt and anger, and has helped me to forgive. Or, at least, is working me slowly towards it.

Times like today are a sobering and painful reminder that God loves us, and He hurts FAR more than we do, over FAR more than we will ever realize. Despite all our trespasses, He pursues us enough that He sent His son to die for us. Tragically, today, that reminder came as a 5 year old.

God, be with those families. There's really no other way to pray, at least not that I can think of.